In the memory of December 2014//
I’m in my bed
And somewhere a few miles away in another city two men blew themselves up in a police academy
I don’t know about it but I will in the morning
I’ll learn to feel about it
And I’ll try not to cry because they’re in a better place after all
I’ll learn that the sun will rise again
And the sky is just as blue and happy everyday
But not for the families of the ones whose blood had been spilled ruthlessly;
Where there were young boys around my age getting trained to protect others

But no one realized that they need protection too
They just came in and blew themselves up
As I sit on my bed, in a warm corner, in my safe haven
Struggling with my words and existence
Struggling with my problems which are nothing in front of those
And I wonder
I wonder when you kill someone; you don’t just kill the person
You kill their dreams
You kill their hard work
You kill their mother who is worried about that they haven’t eaten anything delicious since a month and she is still waiting
You kill their father who forced them to go there because he wanted a good future for them but now he can’t help but think he’s the reason for it and he’s still guilty
You kill the hope of their younger siblings waiting for them at home to bring them what they promised and they’re still hopeless
Now I’m back to my class
It’s a cold December morning and I thought it couldn’t get any colder but I was wrong
Some armed militants in another city not too far way blew themselves up
There are kids in the auditorium
They have books in their hands;
Anxious for the test they have in the next class
They are daydreaming about their favorite movie or book or game just like me

But they would have never in their nightmares thought about what would happen to them in a few minutes
They’re too young to think about dying
They have dreams and aims bigger than themselves but they’re just at the wrong place at the wrong time
I’m here in my class, not much different than theirs as I wait for the bell to ring and this boring chemistry lecture to end so I could go out and have lunch
I’m hungry for food and they’re hungry for life
We’re not much different from one another but I just happen to be on the luckier part of the world
The sky is just as blue even there and it’s beautiful
The sun is shining but it will set forever for a lot of people who had smiles as bright as the sun itself tonight
No one thinks about what could happen
Because it really is beyond imagination
Its too cruel to be true
I don’t know about it yet but I will in a while.