There are a few things that you find beautiful but you can’t reason with them because you know you will fail at the end if you ever tried to,
Like the empty houses and the serenity that you find in them but you would never want to end up alone
Like the smell of a room filled with cigarettes where someone so frustrated let their emotions out last night;
Did they do it by talking to someone, by crying or just by thinking to themselves?
Like the letters you write that you know will never be sent but the pleasure you get during the process is what makes you carry on;
Like the conversations with someone you read repeatedly knowing they have moved way ahead of the person that they used to be
Like the smile you put on your face when you’re dying on the inside
Like the screams you only allow your pillow to hear
Like everytime you pick yourself up after the worst of the falls
Like every morning you wake up, after going to bed at night, wanting to die
Like the moments you destroy procrastinating when you have way more important things to do
Like the poem you wrote for an old lover that you thought you could never live without but here you are admiring it
Like the way you always fall prey to the wrong people when you feel abandoned by your own
Like the way you feel no guilt in plucking the most beautiful flower in someone else’s garden
Like having coffee on hot summer mornings
Like snuggling in your bed with a book in your hands and staying up late on a winter night
Like putting someone else above you when you’ve been betrayed before in the act
Like laughing at your boss’s not-so-funny joke just to get a promotion
Like lying about your favorite book, movie, song, food to impress someone whom you adore
Like complaining about something you know you’re going to miss a lot once you leave it behind
Like adding things to your bucketlist you know there are fairly zero chances of you doing
Like doing something out-of-the-ordinary when you think you’re not that strong to take it
Like putting your life at stake for the stupid little adventures which are neither stupid nor little to yourself
Like wishing for someone to come back to life just to talk to you
Like praying for an angel to come into your life and solve all your problems.
Wow….its beautiful…..
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Thank you Ainnie. ❤
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Bravo.
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Thanks man.
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pleasure’s all mine, Ma’am.
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WOW THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
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THANKS DUDE. 💕
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Beautifully written
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Thank you Iqra. Means a lot. ❤
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Told you I look up to you. This post just proved it. 💌
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Zara you’re too kind yaar. This made my day. Thanks! 💕
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Kinda cried on this one..
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That’s such a compliment!
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Woah did I beat Rimsha to your blog? I’ve always seen her in the comments but I guess I’m taking home the trophy this time 😂😂 although I promise there is no competition, it’s just that it makes me happy ofhow supportive she is when I browse through blogs and see her comments!
This blog post, especially the part about the room filled with cigarettes reminds me of a piece I once wrote, and it is in fact a slogan I use. I often say, “there is serenity in self destruction.” Kind of morbid, yes… But one finds ways in destroying himself to attain a pleasure of possibly hurting oneself to the point where the actual hurt no longer hurts as much…. The point where you out hurt the heart ache… And I’m not talking about being suicidal, God forbid… But as in smoking… You know it hurts and is harmful, but the burning in your lungs down your throat feels like it out hurts the hurt that you had been feeling… Even writing about your pain is like being sadistic because you pick at it… You think of what is hurting in the worst ways to reopen the wounds of. Heart ache to get the right words out. There are some things you’ll never be able to explain, and of course the beauty of it is in the eyes of the one wanting to see it.
Apologies for the dark thoughts, it may reminded me of a few things I’ve had on my mind… But you’ve explained it remarkably well through your examples… It was very thoughtful. As for your last point, may the angels find a way to you with solutions far beyond your comprehension.
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I adore your comments! Sometimes I think they even beat the real post haha. Thanks a bunch. And Ameen. I pray the same for you. 😊 about the self-destruction part, I totally agree with it.
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Ohh I LOVE your writing. This post is so relatable sighhhhh.
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Thanks love. 🌸
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